We did it!

Last chemo completed yesterday but I’m not going to start celebrating just yet. We’ve made it to the top but it’s still a long way down. There’s no helicopter to collect me, no lift to call. I just need to turn round and go down carefully and slowly; one false move …

I am in the care of the chemo unit for the next four weeks then it takes at least six months to recover from chemotherapy, some people longer. I’ve written this on here for my benefit, when I’m frustrated and moaning that I can’t walk that marathon (I’ve not been able to run since I left school), please remind me of this!

I had a lovely few days with my sister and nephew. Unfortunately I wasn’t up to popping into school to watch my class practice their Christmas production on Thursday. Maybe if I’m up to it I can see the real thing. Thursday evening we all went out to celebrate number two and number five’s birthday. We don’t all get together often but was  perfect.

Yesterday was everything I expected it to be! We got to the unit early as I need my pre-meds. I rested my tea on my arm to bring those veins up – didn’t work. Another bucket of what seemed like boiling water – didn’t work although left my arm a nice shade of baby pink. She tried to put the canuela in my hand which seemed successful but hurt so much she had to take it out leaving a nice bruised bump! She used the infra-red machine thing to show up my veins and managed to get one one.

The oncologist told me off for not phoning in the week. I’d had a fever for a few nights on a trot. My book says take temperature and hour later and if not come down ring. It had come down but apparently that doesn’t include diabetes. My psychic powers seem to have gone after finding this cancer! She also said I need to get this nerve damage investigated. I was referred to the pain clinic in the week so that’s a start.

We left the unit 4.5 hours after arriving. Hopefully never to return – that’s no reference to the staff as they were all amazing.

I left rubbish straight away so straight home to bed. Kiddies were picked up my daddy. Four hours later text from ex saying he’s bringing one home as he can’t deal with him. Problems I’m not going into on here as not fair. He’s still here (child not ex). Only mentioning as life goes on, just because I’m going through this doesn’t mean everyone else’s problems stop. Yes I could definitely have done without that last night but there will always be six people who will come before me.

Before bed I apologised to Rob in case I turn into a horrible monster over the next few days and he’s not to take it personally. We’ve know from previous cycles that diabetes and steroids do not mix. He just needs to keep me fed and supply me with insulin!

Last night consisted of wet patches (the wrong kind), no sleep (the wrong reasons) and hourly wee trips! I had my usually hourly wee trips although this time I was woken up looking like I’d just done the celebrity cyclone! I was actually glad not to have any hair! I was boiling and sweating from places I didn’t even know sweated yet my body was as cold as marble. I eventually laid a towel down. Every time I stood up my body would fall back down. Soon as I fell asleep the pain in my leg would wake me. I know what’s on all your minds but no it was fine, Rob slept like a baby and wasn’t disturbed once!

This morning my head is feeling very tight, a day resting I think. Rob’s made me a cup of tea but I think he’s forgotten I’m on steroids and I need feeding. That koi on his arm is starting to look very edible!

I hope you all have a good weekend and sending love to you all. Not an easy time of year for everyone xx